Attack of the Jazz Robots

About ten years ago I drew up rough plans for a mechanical horn machine. Since horn players are rare (and horn players who understand that not every song requires a trombone solo are rarer), I thought I could put together a device that handled some orchestral parts, or at least made some funny noises. It never materialized, mostly because I forgot about it until I saw this video.

Enter the Japanese jazz robot. This is not what I was going to build, but it's a hell of a lot more functional. There's a reason they picked this song to demonstrate the jazz robot - it's probably the pinnacle of jazz saxophone improvisation. In other words, there's a reason people attend Saint John Coltrane Church.

I've listened to Giant Steps maybe 10,000 times. I think it was the only album I had in my car from 1994 through 1998. I have transcriptions of it. I know every note. It's my ringtone, for crying out loud. Let me say - they did a hell of a job. It's awfully stiff, and I don't think any musician would really mistake it for a human, but it's still absolutely brilliant. I'm sure this was just an academic exercise and the technology will inevitably end up in boring non-musical areas (aka robot prune-pickers), but I still dream about that horn section in a box.

A picture speaks a thousand words

If we pick up the Senate, she'll really have something to cry about.

This is why they hate us

http://apnews.myway.com/article/20060812/D8JEMS0O0.html

A question for the ages

Why is it that people who look like they'd be complete dicks almost always turn out to be complete dicks?

For example:

Was John Bolton just born into this world to be a complete cocksucker, or is his unbearable demeanor a result of a lifetime of embarassment and personal disappointment? How many times was young Johnny Bolton pantsed in the locker room? Is his complete and total failure as a human being because no one would go with him to the junior prom?

Even the casual observer can see that this guy is perpetually pissed off. He's the perfect representative for a country that can't figure out why it's so goddamned unhappy.

GOP stops Voting Rights Act renewal

Evidently the 2006 strategy is "Appeal to the base"

Michelle Malkin looks like she was drawn by a marginally accomplished 8th grade art student

"You've done an outstanding job, Cameron, however the eyes are different sizes and the mouth is sort of off to one side"

I like that convicted felon Oliver North uses a 15 year old headshot

I recently read the first paragraph of an article on Townhall.com by convicted-felon-who-sold-arms-to-terrorists-in-Iran Oliver North about why non-convicted-felon-who-did-not-sell-arms-to-any-terrorists-anywhere (that I am aware of) John Kerry is a terrible person, and I was surprised at how little Oliver North has aged since his mugshot was taken (for selling arms to terrorists in Iran):


Then I looked him up on Wikipedia, and found that he's actually much older and fatter than when his mugshot was taken.



I met Oliver North on a book tour in 1990 or 1991, and he was much thinner then. He was still a convicted felon, but at least he wasn't a -fat- convicted felon.